It's been far too long, in more than one way.

It has been far too long,

in more than one way, it has indeed been far to long. I have not blogged in quite some time. In fact, my last blog was in February and was very negative. During that time in my life, I was very burned out with a great many things. Burned out with Christianity, all the forms, rules, regulations, and expectations that are placed on people while NOT embracing real, lasting relationships. My wife and I have been drawn so tightly into a net of reclusivity, that we scarcely make it to church anymore. There's no excitement, no zest for life with Christ, no fun to be had going to church. No vigor from spending hours ministering and seeing a small change in someone's life; that little spark of cognition that the Spirit of Christ brings to man. It has been a dry spell to end all dry spells, and worst of all my friends, it is borderline heresy. That's right, I said it, heresy ... no not burn me at the steak for telling people that loving bacon is not a sin, but heresy as in the sense that I have deviated from my part of the relationship with Christ. I have distanced myself, and for that Jesus I repent. I have called a 3 day evening time fast for my wife and I. That means during the evening she and I are fasting dinner, tv, and entertainment type things in favor of spending MORE time praying, reading, and listening to the Spirit. I have done this for my family for a break through in our finances. Anyways, I was reading on biblegateway.com just for the sake of spurring my "blogging" and journaling and I came across this verse in 1 Timothy 1:3-5
As I urged you when I went into Macedonia, stay there in Ephesus so that you may command certain people not to teach false doctrines any longer 4 or to devote themselves to myths and endless genealogies. Such things promote controversial speculations rather than advancing God’s work—which is by faith. 5 The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith.

As it happened, I began researching what the "endless genealogies" meant, but came across this exposition:
Yet heresy is a term that needs to be carefully defined. As Harold O. J. Brown points out, the term, originally meaning "party" (Acts 5:17), gradually took to itself negative connotations as it was applied to factions that had deviated or split from the apostolic faith (1 Cor 11:9; Brown 1984:2). But the term is used so loosely today (as it has been down through history) that still further definition is necessary. Heresy in reference to a doctrine denotes one "that was sufficiently intolerable to destroy the unity of the Christian church. In the early church, heresy did not refer to simply any doctrinal disagreement, but to something that seemed to undercut the very basis for Christian existence" (Brown 1984:2). Some today (as, again, down through history) would place things like infant baptism or tongues-speaking into this category. Yet to judge from the New Testament and the early fathers of the church, the early church's greatest concern was for deviations in doctrines pertaining to God and Christ and the nature of salvation and justification, because the very substance of the gospel message and the salvation that rests on it lies in these things.
Heresy was originally referencing a theme, a thread, a line of behavior that was "intolerable" and [would ultimately] "destroy the unity of the Christian church." My behavior, my hard heartedness has lead the spirit to blow through other vessels instead of me. Forgive me Jesus. Your church (me) was in disunity. My spirit, soul, and body were not in alignment and agreement with your word, your truth, or your spirit. I pray that you would speak to me once again, renew your fire. Set it deep inside my bones. Make such an indelible mark on my very being that I cannot escape. While you are at it, Jesus, provide me with a job that meets our financial needs, I declare promotion and favor. I declare a position that makes me happy and energized emotionally instead of dragging me down, in Jesus name. Amen. This heresy, though is much more insipid. The underlying issue goes back to one of the heart. Doesn't it always? Lust of the eyes, lust of the flesh and pride of life . Those three root sins cause all humans, everywhere, to stumble. This confession, this discussion of heresy, as challenging and strong as it is, needs to cause the tepid areas of my heart to change. What is it Paul told Timothy in verse 4? "...such things promote controversial speculations rather than advancing God's work-which is by faith Allow Christ to fully reign in your heart, pray with me today a prayer of repentance and allow your heart to be enveloped by the Spirit of Christ once again.

Selah

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